7 Jokes about Couples That Anyone in a Relationship Will Enjoy ...

By Holly

If you're in a serious relationship and are able to laugh about it, there are jokes about couples that you need to hear. People make marriage out to be a horrible death sentence that should be avoided at all costs, but we know that's not quite true. Of course, that doesn't mean that we can't laugh about the stereotype. Here are some jokes about couples that you can think about the next time your partner gets on your nerves:

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1

Before Marriage, a Man Will Lie Awake All Night Thinking about Something You Say

"After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish." This is one of the jokes about couples that you'll laugh at once you've been in a relationship for a few years. At first, all you want to do is be together, but after a while, you'll enjoy the peace and quiet that accompanies being alone. Of course, that doesn't mean that you'll love each other any less. You'll still be crazy about each other, but you'll learn that time apart isn't always so bad.

2

I Used to Be Afraid of Relationships

"Someone would ask me out and I'd say, 'Just take my purse, don't hurt me!'" As happy as you are with your mate, you have to admit loving someone is terrifying. What if they cheat on you? What if they find someone they like better? It's much easier to replace your bag or earn some more cash than it is to heal a broken heart.

3

Marriage Means Commitment

"Of course, so does insanity." If you're declared insane, you'll be committed into an institution. If you're declared husband and wife, you'll be committed to that person for life. You choose the better option.

4

What's the Difference between a Boyfriend and a Husband?

"About 30 pounds." There's nothing wrong with letting yourself go once you find that special someone. You no longer feel the need to run laps around your block and lift weights seven times a week, because you know your partner will love you no matter what. You should always try to stay healthy, but if you gain a few pounds, it's no big deal. Your mate better not care.

5

Marriage is a Three-ring Circus

"First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering." If the first two rings are nice enough, then you'll be able to put up with the last one.

Famous Quotes

If you have a harem of 40 women, you never get to know any of them very well.

Warren Buffett
6

I Recently Read That Love is Entirely a Matter of Chemistry

"That must be why my mate treats me like toxic waste." You know those days when your partner is grumpy, rude, and selfish? Those are the days when you should use this line on him.

7

The Most Effective Way to Remember Your Partner's Birthday is to Forget It Once

You'll never suffer as much as someone who's forgotten their mate's birthday. Buying the love of your life a crummy gift is bad enough, but not giving them a gift at all should be considered illegal.

As much fun as it is to laugh about how horrible marriage and relationships can be, most of us are lucky enough to realize how truly wonderful they are. If you love your mate, then the happiness they give you will outweigh any occasional annoyance. What's the best joke you've ever heard about relationships?

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