Alcohol can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Sure, sometimes it'll make you cheerful and outgoing, but it can also cause you to get fired from your high-paying job and dumped by your loving boyfriend. It's a love/hate relationship that you have to learn how to handle properly. If you don't, then you'll end up the talk of the town (and not in a good way). Here are a few funny quotes about alcohol you can recite the next time you relax with a glass of wine:
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1. Skip the Salad
Sure, leafy greens are healthy for you, but does a nice salad ever get you pumped for a night out on the town? The things that are bad for you are always the most fun, which proves once in for all that life just isn't fair. Of course, even though you shouldn't go overboard with alcohol, it's still okay to drink a bit once you hit the legal age. Salad, however, should be a daily thing.
2. Drowned in Drinks
You've probably heard that alcohol isn't going to solve any of your problems, and it's the truth. Your problems are pretty strong suckers, so they'll follow you everywhere. But if you can manage to be as perseverant as they are, you should live a happy life.
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3. Alcohol's Lie
The great thing about alcohol? It makes you feel like you can do anything. The bad thing about alcohol? It makes you feel like you can do anything. Even though you'll be having the time of your life dancing like nobody's watching, you won't be the happiest camper when the video of you making a fool of yourself goes viral on YouTube the next day.
4. Shocking Surprise
You don't want to ruin your body by constantly pouring alcohol into it. That's why you should make sure to drink a few glasses of water every single day. Sure, it might shock your body at first, but it'll be worth the risk. You want to be healthy, don't you?
5. Party It up
There's a difference between being addicted to alcohol and just enjoying its effects. As long as you only occasionally get drunk, then you'll be a hit at parties. It's only once you become dependent on it that you become the reason why everyone starts to leave the party. Addiction ain't fun.
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6. Pretty Big Problems
There's no one more knowledgable on this subject than Homer Simpson. He knows that alcohol can seemingly solve all of life's problems, but that it's also the cause of most of life's problems. He's the expert, so you better listen.
7. With You or at You
Alcohol alters more than your balance. It also causes your brain to believe that you're more popular than you actually are. So if you suddenly make a room of people burst into laughter, don't be so sure that they're laughing with you. They might actually be laughing at you, but you'll have to wait until your hangover wears off to find out which one.
If you're old enough to drink, and always do so responsibly, then you have nothing to worry about. In fact, you might as well pour yourself a glass right now and enjoy the rest of your evening. What's your favorite alcoholic drink?
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