By Holly • 21 Comments
During that time of the month, you might as well use euphemisms for your period in order to brighten your day. Do whatever you can to make yourself smile, because the unceasing cramps and unbearable pain can tear you down. You have to keep a positive attitude if you want to make it through the week without going crazy. Here are some silly euphemisms for your period that might ease the pain a bit, or at least make the day go by faster:
You probably don't want to dive into the ocean, since sharks are attracted to blood and all. However, during that time of the month, we sometimes start to act a bit like our underwater friends. We aren't going to devour human flesh, but we might get a bit vicious. It's just our nature, which is why this is one of the best euphemisms for your period.
Unless you actually have an aunt named Flo, everyone will know what you're talking about when you use this euphemism. It's one of the least cringe-worthy ones, so you don't have to be afraid of using it in front of young children. It won't scar them for life, so use it freely.
You should earn a prize for putting up with your period every single month for (practically) the rest of your life. It's not an easy thing to do. We have to deal with blood, pain, and emotional turmoil. That deserves some sort of reward.
Periods are the most boring form of punctuation, and your time of the month is anything but boring. That's why you should start calling it your exclamation point. It's more accurate, because it's a pretty big deal.
If you're in a relationship, you don't want anyone touching you down there. In fact, you don't want anyone touching any part of your body. You'll even avoid handshakes and high-fives. You'd rather just be left alone.
This one will make you feel like a super spy. Telling your friends about a code red will take your mind off of your boring life and make you feel like you're in an action movie; at least for a second or two.
You're not actually sick, but it feels like you are. You don't want to move from bed, you need to take medicine, and you're in immense pain. You're feeling just as miserable as you'd feel if you had a cold, so you might as well refer to your period as your girl flu.
Isn't Mother Nature the sweetest? Every month she delivers a personalized gift for you, whether you want it or not. She just won't take no for an answer.
If you're a sports fan, here's an oddly appropriate term to use. Of course, it works best if you dislike the Red Sox. That way, everyone knows that what you're saying is a negative thing, not a positive.
You don't want to spend an entire week of every month depressed. Nobody enjoys their period, but you can at least poke some fun at it. What's your favorite euphemism for your time of the month?